I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize
