how can u be prego again
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
