i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
