I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
