You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
A bitchslap is in order.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
