She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize