I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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