we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
