Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
BRING THE BAGELS
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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