He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
you would pick up someone in the library
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
