let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize