people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
