who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I think I have vodka in my lungs
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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