I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
