You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
love makes seman taste better
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
