i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
