belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
