I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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