well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
