dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize