im six kinds of drunk right now
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Randomize
