I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
