I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
