all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
