I'm lost and stupid without you.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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