Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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