Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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