I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I bet he comes in French.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Randomize
