You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
