I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
