After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
