Is it normal to miss your booty call?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
