Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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