So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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