I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize