Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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