Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
