you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
