You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
