I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
