just tell him i said nine months
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
