your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
