i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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