I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Randomize
