I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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