I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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