I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I can't turn off my feet"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
