do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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