Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
