What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
